Until I got pregnant first time age 32, I had a perfect body (in my own view at least). Slim, athletic and strong, a size s/m, which I could slip into a pair of Levi´s and a funky t-shirt, and that was that, ready to roar and to score. 🙂
I never wore make-up or high heels. As I think those shoes are uncomfortable and unhealthy and unpractical. And lipsticks smells weird, and mascara smudges and I don´t feel I have all that time to spend in front of a mirror. (I wear mascara and an eyeliner sometimes when I go to a party, that´s as far as it goes).
Well. Now that I have born three children, my body has changed. A lot and for good. I suspect.
No more slim waistline. And a few kiloes heavier than before.
Just after I stopped breast feeding, I have all three times gone down to the size I was at age 25.
But sadly, the weight has changed back up again a few months later.
I do eat healthy. Very little fat and sugar. Lean meats, chicken, fish, fruit and vegetables mostly.
I´m cutting down on the wheat. Dark bread in smaller amounts. If pasta and rice, then darker looking versions. Not so much potatoes either.
Not too sure it will help loads.
And you know what?
I can´t be bothered!
I refuse to go jogging. I HATE that activity.
I would love to dance more. But don´t have a lot of time for it.
(And if it happens at night on a dance floor, I will be quenching that thirst with drinks full of calories oh yes I will)!
I do those…what are they called in English… kegel exercises… I recognize they are vital.
I would do badminton if I could find a friend and a time that fits my young children schedule.
I do not allow anyone to tell me what I´m supposed to look like to be accepted.
Men just look like themselves and no one thinks about it.
It is not my duty to look pretty!
As for what about the feeling of being sexually attractive?
Well, in my (not so humble) opinion, being sexually attractive does not have that much to do with the way your body looks. It´s got more to do with the vibe you send out, your self confidence, your radiating that you feel at home inside youself, you look at people with a spark in your eyes, showing you have plenty of energy and a sense of humour, and you can see straight through anyone, into the child within that each of us truely remains at core… That´s attractive to me. That´s sexy.
Yesterday I went to the mainland to see my dentist, and the weather was all wet and windy, more autumn than June look-alike… After the dentist I strolled the walking street, grateful to be out and about all alone, not having to deal with kids´ requests all the time… I decided to go into my favourite café, Queen Louise´s, at Esbjerg´s town square, and when I came in, the perfect corner table by the window was standing there waiting for me!
This was the view I had, from my Chesterfield sofa:
So I ordered a pint of a brilliant lager (“Fynsk forår”; “Fyn-ian (Danish County) Spring”)…
And as I usually do, I wrote a few texts.
It is the most relaxing thing to me. Pen and paper, alone at a café table, those soothing noises of people chatting in the background, some 80s pophits on low volume…the sips of beer..adore it.
Here is one of the pieces I wrote, which is why I write about this issue Body Image today:
Maybe you think my ass is too wide
or my face a bit wrinkly or my tummy too big.
But “sexy” is a quality I carry in my stride,
in my glance when it lingers unafraid where I want.
My body´s my ship, it´s no longer a new one.
But this captain has eyes that have conquered and won.
My hips love to dance and my lips they have humour.
Sexy becomes me, I will never be done.