International Forgiveness Day Part 2

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betrayal

August 2. International forgiveness day. never heard of it until a couple of days ago, when I wrote about it here on the blog. I think it´s a great idea. As it is so fracking hard to forgive. At least to me it is. Takes a lot of time. And pondering, weighing, self convincing.

This campaign, Unify, on Facebook I´ve seen it…. well, I went to their site and I did submit one of my forgiveness stories. I could see myself that it did not look very impressive or convincing, what I´d written. But to me at least it is a step in the direction of letting go.
I don´t …. when a “friend” betrays me….. I close that door.
I don´t relate to that person anylonger. I draw the line.

After chances have been given. Talks have been had. Or offered to be had. I let go.
And I don´t let that person back in. I do not.

What is forgiveness?
To let go and release one´s hurt emotions, deciding not to carry others´ heavy, dirty luggage around anymore… to move on without the burden of others´ wrongdoings towards me…

So.
Yeah.
I sent them my story. And could see that it was way…less devastating an issue, and I was less resolved, than the other stories I could read on Unify´s page there… Well. I expressed, and I read other people´s stories, and I´m sure it has moved me a step in the right direction. I refuse to carry her SHIT around any longer.

Doesn´t sound too forgiving, does it…
It´s the best I can do at this point.
Like everything else, I guess it´s a process? Vent my anger, my truth about it somewhere first, before dropping it maybe…?
And isn´t it possible to forgive and let go, and still remain on a safe distance from the pain-causer?

I have a few people to forgive. And it seems that the further in the past their deeds are, the easier it is for me to say I let it go.

All these thoughts make me more conscious, and through that, more able, to take the next step.
Because there is no fracking WAY she my “friend” gets to be so important in my life that I will suffer because of my lacking ability to forgive what she did.

I sound bitter. I hate sounding bitter. I hate hating too.
So there is no other choice but to continue the process towards forgiving that…person.

Here´s an inspiring video about it. I appreciate these people help me and others to work on our forgiveness issues. It is a matter of health, I can see that. Of self care. I will get there.

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